Have you ever really thought about all the labels you’re wearing? All the ones you’ve been given, or have given yourself throughout your life? The good ones and the bad ones?
What are the stories you’re telling yourself about you? Letting go of labels is key to moving toward your best life so thankfully, I’ve brought in Kasey Mathews to help break it down.
She’s a mother of two, a transformational life coach, an inspirational speaker, and an award-winning author of two books, A Mom’s Guide to Creating a Magical Life and Preemie: Lessons in Love, Life, and Motherhood.
Kasey has helped hundreds of people all around the world find more magic in their daily lives.
Today we have the privilege of learning how labels can be both positive and negative and how to let go of those labels that simply don’t serve us any longer.
As early as elementary school, we begin to identify ourselves as people who “can do this” and “can’t do that”. Things like “oh she’s shy”, “she’s bad at math” or even physical stereotypes such as “too chubby”, “too tall”, have plagued each of us through life.
Whether intentionally placed there from our environmental influences (family, friends), or by ourselves, we unwittingly start to associate with these identifiers.
How do you start letting go of these labels? It all starts with awareness. Kasey compares this to taking off an old, heavy coat that no longer fits you; perhaps one that you’ve needlessly been carrying around. Once you notice it there, it’s easier to let it go.
In talking with Kasey, she prompted me to take my labels in for a closer look. Asking ourselves questions about the labels we’ve placed on ourselves will ultimately help us in letting them go. Think about:
Let’s find those labels and tell them where to go…for good.
Let’s start with those positive words and phrases because not all labels should catch such a bad rep.
For years, I’ve been referred to as “creative” and honestly, this is one label that is both positive and true and one that I would consider a “keeper”.
Creating a list of labels that are genuinely representative of who we are can help us to focus our energy in that positive light. A positively associated with them isn’t the only list you should look at. Think about those labels that feel more genuine in terms of who you are. These labels are just as important and defining as those we should let go of.
Labels are far more than just words or phrases slapped on to us by unknowing family and friends. Over time, they become identifiers of who we think we are at our core.
This where both positive and negative labels take their shape and why we need to watch how they shift into self-sabotaging negative talk.
One great example of this is my own self-talk around math and numbers. For years I was like, yep, I’m terrible at numbers. I’m awful at math. This was clearly the label I had internalized and wore until, well, it just became my schtick. It was my everyday label and who I was.
Kasey points out that labels are the first cousins to beliefs and we need to watch those seemingly harmless stereotypes we place on ourselves as they form our long-term beliefs.
So, how do you identify those lingering labels and reword those limiting beliefs? Kasey talks about becoming more conscious of how we truly feel by watching the words we choose.
Bringing those beliefs to light and becoming conscious of how we feel with the words we choose to use and what we’re saying is key in ridding of the labels that simply don’t serve us any longer.
Stepping into your power and owning who you are begins with identifying those labels, beliefs, and self-talk. Recognizing these labels and stepping away from what doesn’t serve you anymore is a declaration of your self-power.
Declaring your power is like you putting a sign in the ground and saying Nope. Not anymore. I’m taking that label off. I’m losing that shtick.
You can begin to do this by taking yourself out of the label “box”. Instead of stating you’re “great at math” or “terrible at math”, it’s important to reframe your wording into a less confining space.
Reframing your label and wording gives it positive power in the sense that you’re not being confined. Taking “I’m not good at math” and changing it to “There are areas in math I’m strong at”, opens other possibilities.
As Kasey says, it doesn’t have to be an either-or, there’s space to play with both.
Think of a label that you’ve been given, either by someone close to you or one that you’ve assigned yourself. Let’s say it’s similar to mine: “I’m terrible at math”.
Gradually, and often without our knowing, this label becomes that self-identifier and even the brunt of daily jokes. Saying things like: ” I’m bad at math” or “I’m so disorganized” slowly become part of your persona.
As Kasey, indicates the language you choose to use holds the power. We are, after all, the ones who give power to the labels in our words. The words soon form into beliefs, and, eventually our actions.
As Kasey indicates, these labels become a type of self-fulfilling prophecy; carried out by none other than you. You’ll align with that label of “being disorganized” or “being bad at math” and do everything you can to prove it to be true.
Bringing those beliefs to awareness and to light we become conscious of how we feel with the words we choose.
What’s important is that we all know what our gifts and limitations are Becoming aware of them is part of honing in and reframing that mindest.
Take a look again at some of the labels you’ve been carrying. Perhaps it’s a label on your intelligence, a physical attribute or some other characteristic, you’ll want to start identifying what serves you and what doesn’t.
The more we’re aware, the more we can release those limiting, self-sabotaging stories.
After talking with Kasey, I know I’m analyzing more of what I’m telling myself. Noticing my self-talk and looking beyond what others have “boxed” me in as is extremely powerful and a definite change in perspective.
Now, it’s becoming easier to let those labels go and step into more of who I am.
Sit and map out what labels you’re currently wearing. What’s old news, or stuff that doesn’t serve you anymore? Or maybe never did. Do you think you can ditch those labels? I think you can. And probably should. No… definitely should. Letting go of labels starts with awareness and a little self-love.
After you’re done, be sure to capitalize on all this amazing inner work (go you!) with your download of Kasey’s Magical Living Daily Planner.
This planner is the best way to approach your days in a more soulful way by including self-care at the start of your day.
Kasey’s Magical Planner helps individuals with productivity, clarity, and groundedness…sounds like the perfect way to start each and every day!
Speaking of self-love, if you loved this episode, you gotta check out: The Importance of Self-Care with Onnie Michalsky. We dive in with more tips and tricks on genuine self-care.
But wait…there’s MORE! In this episode, Kasey and I chat all about her brilliant career, the crazy thing our firstborns have in common, and Kasey’s incredible journey as a mom of a premature baby -born at just 1 pound 11 ounces-whoa! Go ahead and push play on the episode above to get the full scoop and DON’T forget to check out more from Kasey!
Want even more goodies for your ears? Check out the Imperfect Party Playlist here and find out what song Kasey picked!